So much for the "Quick Shower"

Yesterday I assessed the situation and decided it was a safe time (and my only chance) to take a quick shower before small group. Jake and Sam were both quietly playing in the play room so all was good. I took probably a 3 minute shower, and when I turned off the water I heard "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH" from Sam. So I rushed out in my towel expecting to see Jake laying on him of something, but he was minding his own business, up on a chair in the kitchen doing something at the counter. In passing I asked if he knew why Sam was crying and he said "he's just crying". So I went to pick up Sam and come back to the kitchen, only to find what Jake was actually doing. He said, "look mommy, I cut pear!" with a huge smile on his face. Oh yes, he had a STEAK KNIFE in his hand and had successfully cut wedges of pear (pretty accurately I must say). I lost my breath for a second as I gently removed the knife from his hand, at which point my baby starts coughing and then gagging. I bring him over the sink and start pounding on his back, and out comes a chunk of Matt's ESPN magazine, some saliva, and then a piece of bermuda grass (from an hour earlier when we were outside)! Oh, why do I bother with personal hygiene...